(Alcohol and Other Drugs, or more specifically, champagne and marijuana)

A:
So Lily finished her book. She still won't let any of us read it, but my dad wanted to have a celebration for her, so he bought a cheesecake, a bottle of sparkling grape juice and a bottle of champagne. He poured all three of us FULL glasses of champagne, and sparkling grape juice for himself because he didn't want to upset his stomach. We all took a few sips, then poured ours into his glass because to be honest, champagne isn't that good with cheesecake. To make a long story short, my dad drank the entire bottle of champagne all by himself. And then tried to wash the dishes.
When I walked back into the kitchen, there was an enormous pool of blood on the floor and my dad was just standing there sort of dazedly looking at his hand, which he had cut open on a knife. First I panicked because my first thought was that I was going to have to drive him to the hospital, but it stopped bleeding after a couple of minutes. Then Lily mopped the floor and I finished the dishes.

OD:
My dad used to smoke marijuana. (Come on, didn't everybody?) We recently had a discussion about saunas, because my dad loves them and I am mildly repulsed and confused at the idea of sitting in a room just to sweat. He says they produce an 'altered state of mind' kind of like the spiritual experience of a native American Sweat House. I thought he was full of beans until a few days later when in my driver's ed class we learned that many drugs, including Acid and THC (found in marijuana) can remain in your body, (and especially in fatty tissues like your brain) for years after your last dose. I already knew that, but what I didn't know was that to get them OUT of your body, a good techique is to sit in a sauna. My driver's ed teacher said that if you sweat for long enough, the poisons re-enter you blood stream and you sweat them out, but not before re-experiencing a high or acid trip from fifteen years ago. Really hard-core drug users sometimes undergo this treatment in rehab. My dad doesn't believe it, but I think I now understand the attraction of saunas.
Coincidentally:
Today, as Charlotte and my dad were walking to the dollar store, they found a bag of marijuana on the ground. Not kidding.
I'm waiting for my brownies to come out of the oven at the moment.